The Dog
A German Shepherd of immaculate grooming and total conviction. Warm brown eyes he believes are hypnotic. A small, confident, permanently held smile.
He has never been turned down. This is not because it has not happened. It is because he has never once registered it happening.
The Side-Part
Surgical. Not one hair out of place, ever. It has survived rain, ocean crossings, and an entire evening in which nobody spoke to him.
It is the only thing in these files with a flawless record.
The Approach
He has entered the room. He has seen you. Decline however you like.
“You have such beautiful eyes… have we met before, in another life?”
The Profile
Brunhilde set it up. She has since asked him to stop refreshing it.
Exhibit D · The figure on the left rises daily.
The figure on the right
has never moved.
The Entourage
Loyal. Mortified. Present at every single one of them.
Brunhilde
Doberman. Red lipstick, permanent apology. Keeps a folder of the addresses he has been asked to leave. It is not a thin folder.
Fritz
Poodle. Small, white, hyperactive. Announces every entrance to rooms that did not request an announcement.
Otto
Bulldog. Enormous, medal-covered, has never once had to do anything. Says “jawohl” to questions not addressed to him.
Dieter
Dachshund. Long, silent, keeps the ledger. The ledger is the reason we know any of this. It is all zeroes.
The Ledger
Maintained by Dieter, who has never been asked to and will not stop.
Where Are They Now?
The Beagle who pretended to take a phone call is doing very well. The Border Collie has moved cities twice and is happy in both.
Everyone he has ever approached is thriving, elsewhere. He considers this excellent news and mentions it often.
Current Rizz Level
There is no $RIZZLER token at this time and no contract address. If you are shown one anywhere, it is not ours. This page will say otherwise the moment that changes, and not one moment before.